Beware of German Shepherds shitting blue circles. The miserable rotten fucking dog has just eaten a frisbee sized (or maybe bigger) hole in the freaking sheet the baby barfed on!
Apparently it goes on in like vein for some time.
Kev calls me and says: Do you have any idea of the weird shit you will say to an answering machine?
Didn't even remember doing it....
So then I go to gather up the rest of the laundry and find the foul canine fiend has also chewed through the couch cover that the baby barfed on last night. Add this to the drawerful of venitated onesies, and you will have an idea how pissed off I am at the dog right about now.
Oh, yeah, and I completely forgot about the several newly crotchless panties she gave me last week. She actually selectively retrieves these things from the hamper and ingests them. My yard is full of cloth remnants that have been pooped out.
My dog needs a therapist. Or a muzzle.
I need a day on a beach somewhere where the water is turquoise...
Dream on!
At the very least, I need new sheets...
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